The Fibromyalgia Experiment

The holidays bring out the best in people. The holidays bring out the tired in me. I’m lucky enough to be surrounded by love, I have wonderful family, friends & religious affiliations. I am truly blessed. My only complaint is there is just so many of them, & they all want to do something at holiday time. At this time of year it seems like I need a healthy to fibromyalgia dictionary to communicate to people. Them: But it’s Christmas! Me: So? Santa didn’t bring me a body that can move. Them: But it’s Fun! Me: Sleeping is fun, whatever you are talking about is sheer madness. Them: But so & so will be there, you like them! Me: Yes so I’d rather not them see me try to take a nap on a bench because I’m so tired. Here are some things I am going to keep in mind when dealing with people this holiday season.

1. Learn to say “I’m sorry I can’t”. This is really all it takes, no detailed explanation, no need to feel guilty.
2. People will survive if I have to stay home from something.
3. Patience. Just as much as I want them to understand how something is “not fun” for me, I need to understand that it is fun for them & they only want to share this with me.
4. There is no need to get overloaded. I can invite people to my 4th annual Sara day if I don’t get to see them during the holidays.
5. It all comes from love. People are asking me to do things because they enjoy my company. They are not out to get me. As long as I take care of myself, I can reciprocate that caring in my own way.
6. Ask people what one thing is the most important to them this season. That way you will be able to focus on what matters, & by narrowing it down to one thing, they realize that you can’t do everything, but that you care & will try.
7. Sometimes I am tired. Ok, all the time I am tired. (See what good sentences I make? That is why this next one is so important). When the fibro fog is bad, I take a minute & think about what event I’m going to & who will be there. Then I prepare an anecdote that will likely fit the situation, just a simple story or joke, that I can fall back on & will work with lots of different people. This way I’m not known as the spaced out downer girl.

I even numbered that list right. (I think) Take that fibro fog.

 

 

Filed under: Fibromyalgia Support on November 30th, 2006